Wednesday, 12 December 2012

' I've got a good idea ' he said !

During break times all pupils must vacate the building unless a valid reason is given.
That's more or less what the rule about break times stated. But of course if it was raining or cold yours truly and his mates would find a nice cosy vacated classroom in which to hide in.
 Imagine if you would a scene from stalag luft or colditz. The camp guards patrolling the barbed wire fence with vicious dogs barking at the full length of their leads. That to us was the game. Now, replace guards with dinner ladies and the dogs with the much hated prefects [ spit ].
 An English secondary school is a vast array of corridors and classrooms, toilets and changing rooms. The latter two coming in very handy as all the dinner ladies were well, ladies. Not many would dare to venture into the boys toilets.
 Incidentally , on the subject of changing rooms , I would like to hereby thank the architect who was responsible for designing the girls changing room on behalf of hundreds if not thousands of grateful boys. An open doorway then a left turn past a wall , then a right turn past a wall from the opposite direction so that the entrant did an 'S' shape. Trouble was , the two walls didn't overlap and so a well positioned boy could see straight into the bowels of the changing room . That's where I saw my first naked boobies! Failing that you could climb up on the flat roof and look through the skylight , which was permanently open to vent steam.
 Any way , back to colditz.
This particular day four of us had dodged the guards but had chosen a room at the very end of the corridor . No back way out . Only one thing to do was hide in the cupboards .
 I must have chosen three of the noisiest , stupidest and giggliest friends I could find. Within minutes we were apprehended and marched to the staff room .
 Mr Williams was a very tall daunting figure to any grown man let alone to us mere 2nd years. As deputy head he dealt with miscreant boys in a very firm fashion . Therefore , it was a major shock to be sent outside and made to sit on the lower playground wall for the duration of break time.
 A huge relief.
 As I stated earlier, my friends lacked a lot of common sense and so it shouldn't have surprised me when after ten minutes or so one of them wanted to go to the tuck shop because he was hungry. We had missed dinner but the money could buy lots of sweets.
 Deciding a trip through the corridor was too risky , we snuck around the school boundary to cross the road and home safe. Trouble was we had to pass the staff room window. Yep, no one had thought of that.
 Out flung the window and a ' YOU BOYS !' was bellowed at us by a clearly slightly peeved deputy head. Oh crap !
 Lined up outside his study the three of us could clearly hear the smack of slipper hitting number fours' backside. An occasional yelp told us we were in the shit , big time.
 As last man , I had to suffer the gut ache for the longest which grew and grew with every exiting , crying boy frantically rubbing his backside with both hands.
 That ' let's get this over with ' feeling relieved my stomach a little as I entered his study , but returned immediately he barked ' Bend over and touch your toes boy!'
 Anyone who has had a cold slippering will appreciate just how much it hurt. The first two were full swing strikes shared on each buttock. Thereafter he covered every inch of my bottom with regular measured smacks. The burn grew rapidly to a scolding hot which had to be endured till he decided when to stop as there was no count to be made. I don't know what shoe size his slipper was but judging by his height I'd say about a twelve as he could spank both cheeks at once with a little manoeuvring. My yelps came with the first impact on the top of the thigh. 'Shit that hurts, I can't take much more of this ' Blub.
 Finally I was dismissed and found that straightening upright only increased the pain in my bum and so I quickly headed out of his study and straight down the corridor to the nearest boys toilets.
 Plug in , cold tap on full pelt while I yanked down my trousers and pants.
 ' Fuck , my arse hurts.' I thought as I tried to immerse it into way too small a basin.
 ' I wonder where the other guys went to ?'
 ' And which classroom shall we hide in tomorrow ?'
   Some kids will never learn , Hi , my name is Gary......    


  1. So funny! I love your method of story-telling. You did indeed choose a pack of idiots to hang out with, but then, it wouldn't have been so much fun if you'd had any other kind of friend.


    1. Thank you Hermione but in truth I was no better than the rest of my friends, still am an idiot in many ways. Glad you enjoyed this true story.